JOKE OFF THE DAY I WILL POST A NEW JOKE EVERY DAY

JOKE 1

Q WHATS THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN GEORGE BUSH AND SANTA CLAUS?????

A SOME PEOPLE STILL BELIEVE IN SANTA CLAUS

JOKE 2

A WOMAN POSTS AN ADD IN THE LOCAL PAPER THAT LOOKS LIKE THIS........

LOOKING FOR MAN WITH THESE QUALIFICATIONS, WONT BEAT ME UP OR RUN AWAY FROM ME AND IS GREAT IN BED....

SHE GOT LOADS OFF PHONE CALLS REPLYING TO HER ADDS BUT MET SOMEONE PERFECT AT HER DOOR ONE DAY. THE MAN SHE MET SAID ....HI IM BOB I HAVE NO ARMS SO I WONT BEAT YOU UP AND NO LEGS SO I WONT RUN AWAY.....

SO THE LADY SAID WHAT MAKES YOU THINK YOUR GOOD IN BED????????

BOB REPLIES....... I RANG THE DOOR BELL DIDNT I !!!!!!!

LMFAO... but i thought it was 1 a day it's ok keeps me entertained... that 1 was funny, funny indeed lol

A BLOND AND A BRUNETTE WERE IN A ELEVATOR WITH A MAN. THEY BOTH NOTICED HE HAD SOME DANDRUFF ON HIS SHIRT BUT WERE TO NICE TO SAY ANYTHING TO HIM ABOUT IT ONCE HE FINALLY GOT OUT 2 FLOORS LATER THE BRUNETTE SAID WOW SOMEBODY SHOULD GIVE THAT MAN SOME HEAD AND SHOULDERS AND THE BLONDE REPLIED HOW DO YOU GIVE SHOULDERS??

paddy phones murphy up and says. " murphy mate ive ran over a pig in a country road what shall i do???"
he says
paddy mate if your sure its dead then just throw it in a ditch
paddy replies "but what shall i do about the speed camera it was holding??

LOL

THE 7 DWARFS WERE WORKING DOWN A MINE WHEN IT COLLAPSED. A RESCUER CALLED DOWN CAN ANYONE HEAR ME ???
A VOICE REPLIED ENGLAND ARE GONNA QUALIFY FOR EURO 2008!" SNOW WHITE SAYS WELL AT LEAST FUCKING DOPEYS ALIVE

ENGLAND FOOTBALL TEAM ARE CHANGING THEIR SHIRTS. THE THREE LIONS WILL BE REPLACED WITH THREE TAMPONS TO REPRESENT THE WORST FUCKING PERIOD THEY EVER HAD

POLISH IMMIGRANT GOES 4 AN EYE TEST. OPTICIAN SHOWS HIM CARDS WITH LETTERS C Z W I X N O S T A C Z CAN YOU READ THAT THE OPTICAN SAID??
HE SAID "READ IT"? I KNOW THE FUCKING BLOKE

These jokes are good

LMAO aint they